There are only three absolutes in life: Death, taxes and the Patriots sucking in Tampa Bay in the preseason.
   
The Pats haven’t won an exhibition at Tampa since the Ron Erhardt administration (1981). Since then, the Pats’ futility has transcended regimes, from the days of Ron Meyer (a 41-21 defeat in 1983), to those of Rod Rust (a 44-10 loss in 1990), Pete Carroll (a 45-14 thumping in 1990) and even, gasp, Bill Belichick (three consecutive losses by a combined score of 60-23). I now await the lightning strike for putting Belichick’s name in the same sentence as Rust’s.
   
Whether it’s the heat or the humidity, the Pats simply can’t get it done in Tampa in August. They were certainly terrible in Sunday’s 27-10 loss, and that extended from the first unit through the threes.

Do you agree with Felger's grades, or do you have a serious problem with the letters dished out to the Patriots following their second exhibition game? Or maybe you have a question that needs to be answered by the purveyor of these marks. Email Felger at mfelger@weei.com and you might be worthy of a published response in Thursday's mailbag column, or if Mike deems the correspondence to be truly noteworthy he might answer face to face, through video on WEEI.com. So send those emails on in while you have a chance. Once again, it's mfelger@weei.com.

   
The Pats starting defense was without only two players who figure to start come September (Pierre Woods was in for Adalius Thomas and Antwain Spann was in for Rodney Harrison), yet they still allowed the Bucs to score 17 first-half points while racking up 234 yards and a whopping 16 first downs (by comparison, the Pats’ offense had just five first downs in the opening half).
   
The stage was set early when the Buccaneers picked the Pats’ D apart on an opening drive that took up 17 plays and 9:38 of clock time and resulted in a touchdown.
    
A DVR review of the game (yes, I watched that abomination a second time) showed that the drive was really more a matter of the Pats getting dinked and dunked against their vanilla base scheme than it was them getting pushed around. All told, there was really only one truly bad defensive play on the drive, which came on the third snap when Richard Seymour and Woods took the bait and got caught inside on a third-and-1 end-around that went for 16 yards. The rest was small chunks of yards from backs Earnest Graham and Warrick Dunn and short completions from Brain Griese. Be that as it may, the Pats starters allowed the Bucs starters to control the game.
   
Still, no one is about to sound an alarmist bell over Week 2 of the preseason. To me, the most important development of the game was injury-related – and I’m not talking about Tom Brady. After speaking with him on the radio Monday, I get the sense Brady is not going to play Friday in exhibition No. 3 against Philadelphia with his sore foot, but the season opener against Kansas City isn’t in danger. If it were, he wouldn’t have been on the phone at all. The more concerning injury came to second-year safety Brandon Meriweather, who limped off the field in the first quarter and didn’t return. Meriweather is crucial to the Pats’ plan to get younger and faster on defense.
   
A reminder before we get to the grades: Give me your thoughts, good, bad or indifferent. I will be writing a second column later in the week (which is the schedule all season), and it will be heavily dependant on your email responses. The Patriots are the focus, of course, but no subject is off limits. Most of all, feel free to let me know how badly I suck.
   
Just think Patriots in Tampa. Email Felger at mfelger@weei.com.
 
QUARTERBACKS: B-
   
Mea culpa, mea culpa. Along with many others, most notably the NFL Network crew, I owe Matt Cassel an apology. He wasn’t that bad on Sunday. There’s no doubt his first pass, which was nearly intercepted by Bucs’ linebacker Barrett Ruud, was a pig. But he was on the money thereafter. He had only three incompletions over his next nine passes, and two were flat-out drops from tight end Marcus Pollard and Heath Evans on perfectly thrown balls. I still think the Pats need to find a new backup, but Cassel was actually the least of the Pats’ problems in Tampa. As for Kevin O’Connell, he was active with his legs and less than accurate with his arm, as he was bailed out with nice catches by Chad Jackson (of all people) and C.J. Jones (ditto) on the Pats’ garbage-time touchdown drive. O’Connell’s interception on his first snap was awful. Get ready for the Matt Gutierrez Show on Friday against Philadelphia.
 
RUNNING BACKS: D
   
Laurence Maroney averaged 2.1-yards per carry (15 yards on seven carries) and Sammy Morris averaged 2.0-yards per carry (10 yards on five carries). We’d give this group an even lower grade, but they didn’t get much help from the offensive line. Maroney did rip off a nice 10-yard gain on the first play of the Pats’ second drive. Unfortunately, he followed that up with consecutive runs of zero, two, minus-2 and minus-3 yards. So much for building momentum. Morris, meanwhile, did nothing to move back ahead of Lamont Jordan on the depth chart. Elsewhere, Kevin Faulk had a fumble that led to points and Evans’ drop did nothing to help the embattled Cassel.
 
RECEIVERS: C-
   
Jackson hasn’t exactly seized the day, has he? As scary as it sounds to say, his performance against the Bucs (two catches, 17 yards) was actually an improvement over his God-awful play in the preseason opener (one catch, zero yards). There was one similarity, however: Just as was the case against the Ravens, a pass intended for him was intercepted. This time, it was the ill-advised sideline throw by O’Connell. Maybe it’s a coincidence that balls intended for Jackson seem to get picked off. Or maybe not. Meanwhile, Randy Moss finally played a preseason game for the Pats, a surprise to many. He finished with two catches for 15 yards ... and now I think I speak for Patriots Nation when I say: see you in September, Randy. Wes Welker picked up right where he left off with three possession catches from Cassel for 25 yards. Pollard, who is presumably fighting to make the team, hurt his cause with the Cassel drop in the third quarter.
 
OFFENSIVE LINE: C
   
The play here was better than in the opener, especially in pass protection, but certainly not great. If the Baltimore game was brutal for the men up front (six sacks, two runs for losses, four penalties), then Sunday was merely mediocre (no sacks, but several forced scrambles; two runs for negative yards; three runs for no gain; just one penalty). When the Bucs sent extra men on run or pass blitzes, the Pats had some trouble picking them up. But in one-on-one situations it was okay. Again, it was better in the passing game than in the running game. The obvious lowlight came on the first play of the third quarter when reserve center Dan Connolly sent a shotgun snap high and wide of Cassel and Bucs reserve safety Sabby Piscitelli (what a name!) picked it up for an easy score. Hopefully, Connolly is renting and not buying.
 
DEFENSIVE LINE: D+
   
There was one very good play – when Ty Warren blew up tight end John Gilmore and combined with Mike Vrabel to drop Earnest Graham for a two-yard loss in the first quarter – and many more soft ones. The Seymour-Warren-Vince Wilfork troika played into the second quarter and the Bucs finished the first half with 114 rushing yards on just 19 carries (for a 6-yards-per-carry average). Seymour has shown glimpses of his old burst over the first two preseason games, and the Pats hope that’s a precursor to a return to prominence come the regular season
 
LINEBACKERS: C
   
There was some good stuff outside from Mike Vrabel (six tackles) and Shawn Crable (second preseason sack, four tackles). But the story was a bit different inside, where Tedy Bruschi and first-round pick Jerod Mayo contributed to the Pats’ problems stopping the run in the first half. Mayo was certainly active in the pass game and he wound up leading the team with seven tackles. However, he got blocked repeatedly on inside runs near the line of scrimmage. And instead of delivering the wood to ball-carriers, he got taste of his own medicine in the second quarter when receiver Antonio Bryant stiff-armed him to the ground on his 33-yard reception. Fellow rookie Crable continued to show a good motor, especially on his sack, as he beat reserve tackle Dennis Roland to the outside and closed well on a hesitant Chris Simms.
 
CORNERBACKS:  C
   
Ellis Hobbs made his debut and picked up right where he left off last year, giving up three receptions to the Bucs on the opening drive. Again, most of Tampa’s stuff came underneath, so it’s not like the secondary gave up a ton of huge plays. The worst play came in the second quarter on Antonio Bryant’s 33-yard reception. The play started with a weak jam from corner Fernando Bryant, who allowed Antonio to catch the short in-cut in stride and then elude the tackle attempts of Woods and Mayo. Terrence Wheatley and Spann then took bad angles, allowing Bryant to cut wide and pick up a big chunk of additional yards. Other than that play and the dribs and drabs the Bucs picked up on their initial drive, very little came from their receivers. John Lynch made his debut and looked like a guy who has a ways to go, getting pushed to the ground by receiver Paris Warren on a first-down conversion in the third quarter.
 
SPECIAL TEAMS: Abstain.
   
I’m trying to impress my new boss, Rob Bradford. I really am. But even I have my limits. I simply refuse to break down preseason specials teams play. Stephen Gostkowski (53-yard goal to end the first half) is hitting the ball well. How about that?
 
COACHING: B
   
In the same vein, it’s awfully hard to grade coaching in an exhibition that feature no real game plan. Belichick is obviously being smart resting Brady, among others. Meanwhile, the Pats’ poor performance sets up an interesting scenario on Friday. All things being equal, you’d expect that Belichick would want to play his starters a good amount to show something positive in the third preseason game. But given the short week and the travel, not to mention the continued desire to manage certain veterans in the wake of last year’s marathon season, no one should be surprised if Belichick continues to empty out the bench against the Eagles.
 
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3 UP
    Stephen Gostkowski – At least someone did their job.
    Shawn Crable – Continues to make plays.
    Matt Cassel – No joke. He wasn’t that bad.
 
3 DOWN
    Dan Connolly – Starting center Dan Koppen in no danger.
    Running game – Take away QB scrambles and the Pats gained just 39 yards on 16 caries.
    Marcus Pollard/Heath Evans – Bad drops killed any chance Cassel had of building momentum.